Real Stuff

There is something so wonderful in my life, and his name is Kelby. I am blessed beyond belief to call him mine.

There is someone not so wonderful in my life. It's Kelby's mother, and she wants to erase me from his mind.

I feel the evil, horrible grip of hatred begin to wrap its fingers around my heart every time I hear about her, every time she tries to turn Kelby against me, and every time she completely ignores the fact that I ever existed. It keeps me up at night. It makes my stomach turn with worry and fear. What is she going to do to me next? Will she succeed in tearing Kelby from me? I think of my unborn children, and what I should do when they want to meet their grandma. Will she ignore me then? Will she try to hurt them too?

This isn't something I was prepared for. I am the ultimate over thinker, but not once did it enter my mind that I would have to deal with in-laws that rejected me for my faith. I never expected someone who claimed to follow the Bible to be so...hurtful. Was it in Jesus' plan to have His followers hurt each other so much?

This is life changing for me. I don't ever, ever want to be like that. I don't ever want to be anything but loving and forgiving.

Love your enemies.

"Oh Lord Jesus, please heal this relationship."

Pray for those who persecute you.

"Savior, help her to be blessed when she follows you. Help me to be an example, even if it seems backwards."

The battle plan isn't easy, and it isn't simple. I praise God for my parents in this time, because they have helped me become a better person. They've helped point out the ugly, hideous parts of me that need to be cut off and thrown in the fire.

"Father, I ask that you give me the strength to always be respectful to my parents, and to always keep us close."

Kelby will be with me soon. Much prayer and guidance have brought us to the conclusion that he will be safer here with me, but that is still many months away. I don't know what is in store for him, and I fear for him. But I know he is strong enough.

"Lord, protect Kelby."

In dealing with the most hateful Christians I have ever met, I decided I needed to be the opposite. It's not the non-believers that do the most damage to the church, it is the people inside the walls that are destructive, immature, and blind to what the Word says. If I'm going to proclaim the Word of God, I want to show the world Jesus' heart, not turn people away.

"Jesus, change my heart to be more like yours. Give me the diligence to dive into your Word every day so I know how you want me to act. Don't let me become like them, God."

I truly believe that someday, Kelby's mother will come to love me again. I believe someday her eyes will be opened, that she will be freed from her religion, and experience the freedom that comes with Jesus and His love. I pray our family will be healed.

"I wanna be the change."